On being a hypocrite...
If you follow me on Twitter or Facebook or even here on ye olde blog, you've probably noticed that I've been really absent on the social media front lately. I hate to use this as an excuse because really, it's all work-related, but I have just been swamped with work. All the new patterns go to print tomorrow so we are knee deep in editing and proofing this week. The book comes out in just 8 short weeks so we are finishing up the promotions and marketing plan which includes blog tours, parties and a very special schoolhouse session at the Spring Quilt Market. Throw on top of that my busiest fabric season EVER -- two lines and three different substrates! More on all of that soon.
But, as the last of the patterns are being proofed by Emalee I found myself with a few minutes to spare this morning, so I thought I'd update the blog, but with what? My brain is mush right now because of being torn in a million different directions, lack of sleep and what not, so I can't do a serious work-related post at the moment.
Been thinking a lot about parenthood and about how it changes you... one might even venture to say it makes you somewhat of a hypocrite at times. The things I used to roll my eyes at and even mock out loud when I was young and single, are the things I find myself doing (and proudly) now.
Case in point, before kids came around, I used to think New Years Eve was not New Years Eve without a rocking party and a killer hangover the next day. Now, I find nothing wrong with staying home with the family, letting the kids stay up till midnight for once (even if one of them doesn't quite make it) and hugging and kissing at the stroke of midnight. The 20-year-old me would've thought the 40-year-old me was uncool, sad and utterly boring.
But more recently, the topic of music came up. I admit that I'm definitely not a prude when it comes to music or TV. As a kid and young teen it was all about Madonna and George Michael and we all know what some of their lyrics were like! Then later on, it was darker genres of music... I was all about alternative and industrial bands. The lyrics of some of these songs are utterly disturbing... but I loved them! And somehow I turned out alright (or so I hope).
Now, when it comes to my kids, it's a totally different story. They were listening to Pandora last night, the Selena Gomez station. I was working on my laptop just a few feet away, thinking it was all cool and fun. Then a Rihanna song came on. It was Rude Boy. Now, I'm not a Pandora expert, but I glanced over and saw that they had the lyrics up on the screen... and Sydney was looking at them! Eeeeek! I jumped out of my chair and skipped the song so fast she didn't know what happened... it was like supersonic speed!
So, I started thinking today and a facebook conversation between family and friends was sparked about this. Ya know, I never intended to be a "freaky mom". I know all too well that kids will be exposed to things worse than this in life (through school, friends, TV, etc.) and I can't shelter them forever. I also know that it's better if they are educated about things and if they feel free -- and comfortable -- to ask us questions if they are ever confused about something. That's why, as they grow older, I hope they see Jon and I as "friends" besides just "mom and dad".
But a little part of me just can't help but be overprotective and want my girls to stay little and innocent for as long as possible. I mean, I just cringe at the thought of my 7 year old singing (even if it's in her head) "Come on rude boy, boy, can you get it up?" or "Sex in the air... I love the smell of it!" Eeeek! Just typing that made me get chills all over. And again... the 20-year-old me would've thought I was ridiculous. But then again, the 20-year-old me would've hated Rihanna for a whole other reason... too mainstream! ;)
All of this talk about kids growing up too fast got me thinking about the little things... the little accomplishments that are bitter-sweet. Like, for example, the first time they are able to take a shower alone. Sydney (7) just started showering unassisted about 6 months ago. Of course, one of us always sits right outside the bathroom door... just in case. I usually just bring my laptop and check email or something. But as much as this alleviates our workload as parents, it's a little sad when they don't need you for everything. Also, I know this is going to seem so trivial and dumb to anyone out there who doesn't have kids but, the first time they understand that they have to hold on to the cuff of their long-sleeved shirts or sweaters before they put their jackets on because otherwise the sleeve will ride all the way up... that day is HUGE! And I mean tear-jerking huge... as in, WOW, she's all grown up! sniff, sniff. Then I remember all the times I whined about why they don't understand that and I have to go and fix the situation. Am I alone?
Mark my words... this little one up there ^^^ is gonna be trouble one day (regardless of what music she listens to!)
Anyway, well... looks like Emalee is done proofing, so I need to go and make some edits now. It's been fun, but that's it for now, folks. Deep thoughts, by Patty Young. ;)